suzefricker@mylifeaccordingtome.org Available all the time, just send me an email and I will get back to you.

Jennifer McQueen Part 2

Jennifer turned up to her appointment. She didn’t know why she was there she knew that she was different but did not know why the appointment would make any difference. She looked around the room and realized instantly she felt warm and safe. She didn’t know what about the room made her feel this safe but she just did.

She looked around and saw that she was sitting in a small room with windows that opened up to a children’s play area. She could feel the joy that would be had on the children’s toys and it made her smile. She knew that people would not understand that. She had kept that to herself for so long. She looked at the sky and it was raining. Jennifer did what she always did when it rained, she put her arm out of the window. The rain felt cool against her skin. She closed her eyes and felt the calming sensation she always got with the rain. She felt the tingling of her skin and took a deep breath. Just as she did this a woman walked into the room.

The woman was tall and slender. She had beautiful blond hair. Jennifer looked at her and automatically the song Jolene started playing in her head. Often when she looked at people she associated songs with them. She never understood why this happened. People who caused her problem often got rock songs associated with them. When she got into trouble and did not know why the rock songs played or when she liked someone who didn’t know she exists it would be songs from movies.

The woman was looking at Jennifer as if she was sizing her up. Jennifer did not know whether she needed to run and hide or speak so she just stood there staring. The woman started talking.

“Hi, my name is Matilda, and I am here to talk to you. You can sit if you would like or stand if you would like”.

So this woman’s name was Matilda. Jennifer thought, she does not look like the Matilda from the movie and got lost in the fact that she did not look like her. Then her mind told her, “how could she look like her, Matilda was a child in the movie.”  Jennifer shook her head and sat down.

This was the start of something that would change Jennifer’s world forever.

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Note from the Author

I started writing this story to share my imagination. Partly as a therapeutic tool but also in the hopes to get some fundraising done for my needs. If you like my story and feel like you would like to help me please donate to my PayPal pool. If you would be willing to help please donate what you can to  https://paypal.me/pools/c/8jodKc0c02 every penny helps. I will hopefully have the next installment for you next week.

The Story of Jennifer McQueen Part 1

Jennifer McQueen could not understand why she was different. She had always been different but did not know why. Why was she different from all the girls in her class? Why did she have to be who she was? She just could not understand it. This all changed one day when she met Matilda. Matilda, unbeknownst to her would show her what it was like to be different. She would show Jennifer that it was ok to be who she was and, that her uniqueness brought a whole set of amazing skills that she never knew she had.

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Jennifer was born into a family that was normal. They lived in a normal house, had normal jobs and went to normal schools. They were typically normal. This made things hard for Jennifer who was not normal. She would often get into trouble for acting out because she was different from everyone else. She never understood why.

She made other people feel uneasy because she was different. She was bullied in school because she was not like everyone else and her teachers did not get her. After a while, she chose to start hiding who she was as best she could. She would take the ridicule and she stopped sharing whatever she was able to keep to herself.

To say that she had no friends would be an understatement but to Jennifer, but she did not care. She kept herself busy in her own mind with the people she wished she was and who she was. In Jennifer’s mind, she had groups of friends that would never let her down and never let her stand alone.

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Matilda never knew that one day she would change the life of someone so drastically. She went to work every day looking for people with specialness inside. Most of the time these people knew they were special and she was just a step on the way to finding their full potential but never in her life did she think that she would meet someone who didn’t know who they were so much.

One day, Matilda went into work and found that she had a new client. Jennifer McQueen was her name. Little did she know that what she would do for Jennifer would change her life so completely but she was so wrong.

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Note from the Author

I started writing this story to share my imagination. Partly as a therapeutic tool but also in the hopes to get some fundraising done for my needs. If you like my story and feel like you would like to help me please donate to my PayPal pool. If you would be willing to help please donate what you can to  https://paypal.me/pools/c/8jodKc0c02 every penny helps. I will hopefully have the next installment for you next week.

Alone

When I am in my home away from those who do nothing but bring me down I am alone. But I can handle being alone in this situation. However, when I am there, I feel more alone than ever. I know what those who abuse me think of me.

I am a fake!

I am a loser!

I am a hypochondriac!

They spend their time making me feel so small for something I can’t control. For something that I finally feel comfortable expressing. Now, because I know what they do and say behind my back I have to hide who I am again. It is tiring. I can’t believe it. Because of this, the only time I can be me is when I am on my own or at work. I thought with my autism diagnosis I would be freed, now it has just brought more abuse. What do I do? I need help and there is no help available because for me to report them to get help, I put the life of someone else in jeopardy who relies on my abusers. How can I make my life better only to make someone else’s worse? The only option I have left is to crowdfund. Life is suckish.

If anyone can help me stay safe please donate what you can. I feel like I am going to go insane otherwise. My PayPal Pool is https://paypal.me/pools/c/8jodKc0c02, however, I ask it is not put on facebook. I can’t risk someone finding out about it.

Thanks