Life with a neurodiverse condition is hard enough however, life with two neurodiverse conditions which are polar opposites of each other is even harder.
At 16 I was diagnosed with dyslexia and slight dyspraxia. This amongst other things affects your ability to deal with sequencing.
At 31 I was diagnosed partially as suffering from Autism Spectrum Condition. This really makes me want to do things step by step and follow my routine.
Two neurodiverse conditions that are polar opposites of each other.
Normally the autistic side wins out with me and I am able to do things the way they are supposed to be done. However, 2 weeks ago I got over-enthusiastic and my ability to sequence what I am doing got me into trouble. Not only did it get me into trouble it left me feeling rather low. A few days later the autistic side of me took over and I realized where I had gone wrong but by that point, the damage had already been done.
I am feeling very shakey about this because I seem to of upset someone who I really admire and I am learning more about emotions so I am now 60/40% sure that I have upset her all because my ability to sequence fell down and the emotive side of my head decided to make a power play.
I do not know what to do.
I lost the support I had from the NAS when I moved to Chatham and have been unable to get free support set up since. Now I do not know what I am doing and am worried that I have damaged the relationship I had with this person. 😦
Some times I do not know how I manage to get anything done in my life having two completely different conditions. 😦 It is like a constant war in my head over who has control and I am going to get it wrong from time to time. How do I rectify this?