Available all the time, just send me an email and I will get back to you.

Why I am so Stressed

So I have been sending some rather stressed messages on social media and now I need to explain why. Everything that I am going through at the moment costs money and now I need to get support in things that I need help with because I have been denied permission to get a service dog. So here is a list of things I need to pay for;

  1. £1800 to pay off my abusers and be able to cut the strings so I no longer need to spend part of my week there 😦
  2. £3000 to find a new place and pay first and last month’s rent where I will be allowed to apply and get a service dog.
  3. £3000 to cover any possible damages at my current flat
  4. £3000 to arrange for movers to pack up and move me
  5. £10,000 to cover travel to and from London
  6. £1560 to arrange for home care help for the cleaning that I am unable to do myself without the help of a service dog
  7. £4000 to replace the furniture that I am in need of which includes a wardrobe, chest of drawers, bed as I do not have a wardrobe, my chest of drawers is broken and my bed is broken. I also need to find a bed that is easier for me to get in and out of.
  8. £1000 for adaptions for my flat
  9. £7000 to get myself out of the debt I got myself in so that I can finally start saving so that money could go towards supporting myself properly.
  10. £5000 to take classes to learn to do things and get life skills to learn how to cook, properly manage my money, etc.

All of this is what I need to pay out for and I have nothing. How do I pay for this stuff with nothing? Who do I turn too? Who can help me? I need help and after months of trying to get help crowd funding I have finally given up. No one is going to help me. So now I have to struggle alone 😦 my walls are closing in and I wonder why I fight so hard. If I could I would just run away. But I can’t do that. I can’t just start again. I almost wish I was in a real witness protection programme that way I would get a new identity and could start again. But no one will help me.

Abuse victims are on our own.

Autistic abuse victims are on our own

depressed autistic abuse victims are on our own.

No one out there cares to help when we are in need. They don’t know what it’s like to be told your worthless so much that you believe it. To have your own family judge you not because of what you knowingly do but because of things you have no control over. To have the people who supposedly love you judge you because you were brave enough to say something is wrong and be proved right.

I am all alone.

My life

The Joys of Me

So over the weekend I did a post about disability advice. Well today I am going to say I hate being injured. When I reinjured my shoulders I had to go through a lot more pain now.

I now have to use a sling on which ever arm hurts the most. This is really starting to reek havoc on my day to day life.

I tried to do some shopping and honestly pushing a trolly around with one hand was a pain in the ass and very difficult to do.

However, there is a light at the end of the tunnel. When I went to the shops today a woman freaked out that she did not have any money for the trolly. I went into my purse and found I had an extra £1. I gave it to her.

When I was done shopping she had been waiting for me and tried to give it back to me. I told her to keep it. If she then found someone in need she should give it to them. She went and brought an envelope and put the £1 in it. She labelled it “for future help”.

This just shows that if you are having a rough day with your disabilities, there is always someone who may be in need. So when you get help, make sure that you pay it forward. It is pretty easy to forget in this day and age to forget to be nice. The smallest act of kindness can make the biggest difference. So make sure that you dont forget about it.

Disabled Avice

What you should do when you are struggling?

I have had to learn something the hard way. On the 27th December I had a fall and wrenched both my shoulders. I tried to stop myself from falling and it didnt work at all.

I looked after them for a week and thought that things were ok. I tried to do some fitness yesterday to get some exercise and did too much. Now both my shoulders are back to being in agony.

So, advice to people who are disabled and dealing with an injury. Don’t over do the exercise. You will find that you are suffering more in the long run.

I know this sounds like I am telling you to suck eggs, but I made the mistake and I know my limitations, so it can happen to anyone at any time. Just make sure you look after yourself.