When I am in my home away from those who do nothing but bring me down I am alone. But I can handle being alone in this situation. However, when I am there, I feel more alone than ever. I know what those who abuse me think of me.
I am a fake!
I am a loser!
I am a hypochondriac!
They spend their time making me feel so small for something I can’t control. For something that I finally feel comfortable expressing. Now, because I know what they do and say behind my back I have to hide who I am again. It is tiring. I can’t believe it. Because of this, the only time I can be me is when I am on my own or at work. I thought with my autism diagnosis I would be freed, now it has just brought more abuse. What do I do? I need help and there is no help available because for me to report them to get help, I put the life of someone else in jeopardy who relies on my abusers. How can I make my life better only to make someone else’s worse? The only option I have left is to crowdfund. Life is suckish.
If anyone can help me stay safe please donate what you can. I feel like I am going to go insane otherwise. My PayPal Pool is https://paypal.me/pools/c/8jodKc0c02, however, I ask it is not put on facebook. I can’t risk someone finding out about it.