I know you wish you were like all the other kids in school. You wish that you were not different. You wish that the comments would stop and that you would be accepted for who you are.
I know that when you get up in the morning wishing you could stay in bed and pray that you could stay safe. I know at times you feel so low that you want to die.
I know how you feel because I was you. I was picked on and bullied my entire school life, unfortunately for me it wasn’t until I was an adult and late late teens that I found out what made me different but it hurt. The comments that kids made, the names I got called and sometimes even physical violence. I just wanted it to end. I didn’t know how to bring the subject up with anyone because when I did things got worse. So, I internalised it all.
But, I want you to hang in there. No matter what makes you different you are special. No matter what you deal with on a day to day in school it can get better. It is hard to see the light right now but it is there and you can be who ever you want to be. You can get a college degree and you can have a career and those bullies you dealt with in school are likely to find out the hard way what Disability is. When they have to deal with it either in themselves or in the family they love they will realise and regret the choices they made. They will remember you forever because they will regret it and you will not remember them.
The light may seem far off but don’t loose hope. Don’t let the bullies win. Because everything you are going through now is giving you more strength to go out and get what you want.
Your family love you and you are loved by people who don’t even know you.
Find your strength and fight on through the pain and through the hurt because what is waiting on the other side is acceptance, love and understanding.
Bullies can only win if you let them. So fight hard every day to prove that you are the awesome person that you are.
Prayer, love and support going out to you and all children who have a Disability x you are all loved x
When you are autistic you can have some peculiar eating issues.
Some people can not let their food touch, other people have to eat their food in certain orders, and most have issues with textures of food. What I have found realizing my issues with food are linked with my autism I have noticed that people really do take for granted what they eat.
I learned from an early age I have an issue with meat. I can not stand the texture of most meat is most formats. Because of this, I had to dabble in vegetarianism. However, this is not a hard and fast rule. So, I can deal with corned beef when it is completely mashed up into a corned beef hash. I can handle mince if it is not fresh or too long, essentially it has to be small enough that when cooked it can just be swallowed if I have to chew it then it is not good. I can not handle roast anything. I hate the texture and I hate anything that is still in the form of the animal it was. I can’t eat it. It becomes a chewy mess in my mouth and my body will not let me swallow it.
But again, it is not just meat that I have an issue with. I can’t eat egg in any format I find the texture horrible and taste even worse. Essentially if you want me to eat an egg you need to drown it in BBQ Sauce and I mean DROWN it. Brown bread I hate the texture so I can’t eat it. Broccoli, cauliflower, (tree veggies) you will never find me eating them Quiche HELL NO and the list goes on. It is a problem of texture and taste for me. Mostly the texture of it but sometimes it is both.
So, when I see people make HUGE plates of food and then throw half of it out it breaks my heart. When you have problems with food, you really realize how much actually goes to waste in the world. I try not to waste so when I make a big pan of anything I will portion it up so I had risotto twice in a row this week because I was not about to throw half of it out.
It can get me down because I struggle with cooking and it is harder to find recipes that are for vegetarians which keeps out the food I cant handle. I would love to learn recipes that would work for me but I am not sure they exist. My dream would be to fly out to LA, spend one on one time with a top chef *cough* Anne Burrell*Cough* or others like Bobby Flay, Alton Brown, Tyler Florence, Robert Irvine or Beau MacMillan *Cough* Anne Burrell *Cough* I think his name is and give them a list of what I cant make, what I can’t eat and work out some simple dishes that would A give me better skills in the kitchen but also be healthy for me.
Cooking and food are a big passion for me but it is also my biggest pain. The world of Autism is not great. You do your best to bring the positives to the surface but the bad stuff like issues with food can always bring you down.