A routine to an autistic person is as important as insulin is to a diabetic. With out a routine we can feel lost and are more prone to meltdowns as we are unable to deal with change.
The thing is, each autistic person handles change at various levels so the routine that works for one may not work for all.
So tips I have picked up for myself are:
- Work out how much change you can handle before you plan your routine;
- If you can’t handle change on a big scale make sure your routine is not so strict that you can’t allow for unfortunate incidents;
- If your routine has to be flexible like mine does as I am a back up carer for my dad, make sure that you plan far enough in advance so that you can handle the upcoming change.
- Understand that something may happen beyond your control and that if you are struggling to deal with it, it’s fine. Seek help and someone to talk to.
These are some of the tricks that have helped me.
Am I the only one out there who gets flustered when you ask someone what they want for Christmas or their birthday and they say “surprise me” or “you know what I like”. I don’t do vagueness. Never have and never will. Now I know that that is part of my autism.
So a cheat that I have learned about is making a Wish List. But, it doesn’t stop there. You get everyone that you buy presents for to create a Wish List as well.
Take for instance Amazon. I have a Wish list set up there and I have set it so that any time someone buys something from it, it clears off. I have also asked my brother to do one, my mum to do one for her and dad, and I will be asking my sister to set some up for her, her husband and her kids. This way when it comes to shopping for Christmas I can peruse their wish list and get items that I know they will like.
This is a cheat around having to be frustrated with Neurotypical people who just don’t quite understand that the vagueness is not something we as autistic people can handle. It also means that I know when it comes to birthday and Christmas, I will get something that I actually want instead of something that I might not necessarily want or need.
For anyone who does not know how to set up an Amazon Wish List, let me know and I will skype you and talk you through it.
I have been asked what would I do if I won or was given £1,000,000.
Firstly £150,000 would be split 3 ways between my mum, my ex’s mum, and my exs dad. Sounds weird but they did a lot for me and my ex when we were together so I would give them that money free and clear.
Secondly, if my dad was still alive, I would give another £50,000 to my mum for home care support of her choosing.
That takes me up to £200,000.
Thirdly, I would pay off any and all debts that I had so I was financially free and clear.
Fourth, I would complete my dream of owning my dream home. So I would buy a plot of land and have my dream home built on it. It would be energy efficient and good for the environment. It would have a number of rooms so that I could apply to be a foster parent.
I recon that would take up at least another £400,000. So now we are at £600,000.
I would then out money into a savings account for my niece and nephew and any further kids my sister may have. If the interest was good etc hopefully they would not need to worry about the cost of student loans when they turned 18.
Essentially if I was given or won £1,000,000 very little of it would go to me. The rest would go to people who deserve it and to help me help others.
What would you do?
I wanted to write this post as we are now in September. We have only a few more months till Christmas. If you are in the States you have Thanksgiving first and then Christmas.
I wanted to remind you that no matter where you are in the world during these public holidays we have men and women in Uniform who will be working.
They dont do what everyone else does and says “See ya in the new year”. Instead of being with family and friends they are making sure that you and I are able to enjoy our holidays in safety. It is also not just them it is there families as well who serve. They do it proudly.
So when we start the run up to the holidays may I ask that you all think of someway in which you can thank someone in uniform on Christmas Eve, New Years Eve, Thanksgiving or any other public holiday.
Even if you just say on social media #ThankYouForYourService will mean the world to people.
Thanks for reading.
So as most of you know on June 29 2019 I moved into my very first proper flat. I am living on my own for the very first time. This was a very tough decision for me but for my personal safety and my mental wellbeing I needed to not be with my parents full time.
As of September 29, I will have made it exactly 3 months semi on my own. I say semi on my own because I still have to work in London so I still stay with parents when I am there. However, I try to be in my second home more then I am in London. This varies week to week due to the needs of my mum and dad as I am still my dad’s secondary carer.
So some tips I can give you for moving into a new property as an Autistic person;
- Make a list of all the things that you need to do i.e. register council tax, change your benefit address, etc.
- For key things make sure you have them from the get-go (why not try buying them in advance so that when it comes to moving you already have it)
- Temporary furniture such as blow-up sofas are very handy
- Start working out your routine from day one. Which days are going to be your cleaning days, which days are going to be your chill days. If you have to travel for work which days are best for you. All these things work out nicely.
- If you are in receipt of disability benefits and your new place includes train travel apply for your Disabled person’s railcard. (money saver)
- If you work, take 2 weeks off as holiday so that you have the time to acclimatize to the area.
- Have back up plans in place in case you need them. Mine is that my mum is going to keep me on the tenancy so that I have a room should the shit hit the fan!.
Remember as autistic people we don’t do well with change, however, the more planning and preparation you put into it we can minimize the stress that comes with moving.
My subscription is due to end for the professional blog. I only earned $0.12 and so I will not be able to renew it as I am unable to afford it. If this affect the blog in any way I apologize 😦 I am devastated that I will no longer be able to continue with a fully professional blog but considering I can’t even get donations on my gofundme page to get the care I need set up for my disabilities, I just can afford the renewal.
So I have had a string of people telling me that I am an inspiration and to be honest I do not understand why.
For me, I am just living my life. I have learnt ways to cope. If I have a meltdown due to my autism I work from home till I have fully recovered. If I have problems with my back I work from home till I no longer need to. If I feel low I try and reach out to people for support.
The truth is that every day for me I do not know what I could be doing because of all of my disabilities. Apparently though because I want to work this makes me inspirational. Because I, with all my disabilities still go out of my way to support others, it makes my inspiration. I do not understand this. For me, I am just living my life knowing what I can and can not do and I make the most of a bad situation. I still try and do things that everyone else can do but I do it in a controlled manner. Because of this, I have to plan well in advance what I am going to do. It doesn’t make me inspirational. It just me living my life.
I don’t understand how me living my life makes me an inspiration? Can someone explain this to me?