A week of crazy

So this week coming I have a lot to do and unfortunately I will be working from home the whole week. It can be a good thing but it can also be a bad thing. Luckily I will be seeing my support worker tomorrow and I will be on a training course as well on Thursday.

Happy days.

My holiday really has imprinted on me my need for self-care so I am doing more to support myself and help get myself more independent. This includes getting a shopping trolly so that I can go to Sainsburys when I need to and not wait for online orders for everything. It also means I am getting a 4 wheeled laptop bag so I do not have to carry much on my back to avoid extra pain. Lastly, I am going to start using buses more and fewer tubes which means that I will be walking more in between as well..

Clearly, my holiday has empowered me to do more and try and claw back some independence.


On this Day Part 1

Every day I will try and post an on this day post. I got a book of cool facts and think I need to share.

So on this day (April 22nd) the following:

  • April 22 1500 : Portuguese navigator Pedro Alvarez Cabral discovers Brazil and claimed it for Portugal.
  • April 22 1889: Russian born Novelist Vladimir Nabokov was born.
  • April 22 1915: German soldiers used gas for the first time on the Western Front
  • April 22 1971: The death of Haiti’s hated leader Pappa Doc
  • April 22 1983: The £1 note was replaced with a £1 coin
  • April 22 1994: Richard Nixon dies
  • April 22 1838: The British steamer Sirius became the first steamer to sail between New York and Britain

Tune in tomorrow for the next installment.

Prayer for Uniformed Services in Sri Lanka

Dear Lord

I ask that you look over the Sri Lankan Police, Fire Service, Military, Doctors, and Nurses as they deal with the fallout from the explosions that have happened. Lord, you know that they are facing some seriously horrific images and they will not be able to save everyone. Lord you know they put on their uniforms so those who cant serve are kept safe and well.

Lord, I ask you to bring them peace in the coming days. Let them know that they are loved and respected for all that they do for others. Be with the survivors who are there and give them peace.

In your name I pray.


God Never Gives you more than you can handle

“No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it.” 1 CORINTHIANS 10:13

This is something that as a Christian who has lived the life I have led that I have seriously struggled with. I often have felt during periods of my life that God has expected far too much of me and wondered why he throws these things in my path.

To give you an idea, this is what I have survived during my life;

  1. Cancer Scare
  2. abuse – mental
  3. abuse physical
  4. abuse sexual
  5. attempted rape
  6. loss on a large scale
  7. undiagnosis of autism
  8. undiagnosis of dyslexia

But I have always come through. I have become stronger then I have ever been. Now, I am able to focus on what matters to me.

It is when I stopped arguing with God and demanding to know why he was so vindictive I have been able to accept that I am a strong person.

God is there for you if you let him.

Colombo: Following the deadly attack that killed nearly 160 people, Sri Lankan government ordered curfew from 6 pm Sunday to 6 am Monday. A series of eight devastating bomb blasts ripped through high-end hotels and churches holding Easter services in Sri Lanka on Sunday, killing nearly 160 people, including dozens of foreigners. Prime Minister Ranil […]

via Nearly 160 killed, 450 injured as 8 blasts hit Sri Lanka; curfew imposed — UPHINDIA

Prayers for SriLanka today please

What Easter Means to Me

Ok, aside from the fact that you get chocolate on Easter it means a lot to me.

So, let me break it down for you. Lent is the period of time where Jesus went into the wilderness for 40 days and 40 nights. He did not eat and was tested multiple times by the devil. The week leading up to Easter Sunday is the period in the run-up to Jesus’s execution on the cross and Easter Sunday is the celebration as to when he rose again from the dead.

Now, technically, and I had this argument with my mother today it was 2 and a bit days, however, I am working on a 24-hour clock and she quite rightly pointed out they may not have had that during Jesus time. This is one of the things that my autistic mind struggles to contend with but it is one of those things that I just have to accept that I may never fully understand.

So, you may still be wondering why Easter is important to me. Well to tell you the truth, I have never known anyone who was willing to die for me. Have you? Jesus went to the cross knowing that he was going to die, that it would be a painful death and yet he still went. He didn’t sacrifice himself for himself, he did it for people who were not even born yet. That is true love and devotion in a can. He died so that every single person in the world could be washed of sin.

Even in the bible, it says that as long as we apologize for things that we do wrong then we are forgiven. It all stems out of Jesus sacrifice to us.

I am by no means a saint. In my 32 years, I have done enough to make God wash his hands of me. I have drunk, been very promiscuous, lied, cheated, and everything there in between. I have been a victim of abuse and because of the depression I have regularly told God that I hated him. Yet, in 2008 when I had a serious cancer scare (14cm lump in my left breast) and had to have major surgery to remove it, he still was there waving at me saying “see I am here”.  Ever since then I try and walk the path that he has for me.

The truth is once I stopped fighting God I have been able to see the right way to go. I am able to what my purpose in life is. God is amazing. As is Jesus.

That is why Easter is important to me.

You never know….

You never know how run down you have gotten until you actually stop and take some time for yourself. This is something that I have learnt the hard way. I was soo low before I went on holiday. Even with some of the people who I was penpalling with all I could write about was my up coming trip. This is not a good sign for anyone. When you are that run down you have pushed your body to beyond the limits you should have… It doesn’t help with your mental health or your physical health.

You must always remember that you are important and no matter how much good you do for others, you will never be able to continue if you run out of energy or steam.

For people with disabilities, we all know that we have the added pressures of managing our disabilities as well as everything else that we do and so it is important to know what your limits are. If you want to try and push beyond the limits to do it in a way that you are not going to hurt yourself.

I emplore everyone to make sure that they make time for themselves as often as they can. You do not need to be left in a position where you are unable to continue. Look after yourself and then you will be able to look after others x